Hobbies, Poetry, Writing

What Love Was Theirs

 

 

She used to think that the one she loved shined marvelously for her, and only her. But the starlight shining bright has faltered and it’s grown dim. She doesn’t know what to think of her beloved any longer, now that she has become changed. What they had was a love story, bursting pinks and violet reds, churning out love and sweet things ripe with passion. It was all over the place, people didn’t know where to look.
Now she scalds her tongue on the love that’s burnt and it tastes bitter. Invisibility used to be her shield, the thing that kept her hidden, but now she cries out to the one who refuses to know her. The One. Who, like a child, is ignorant of her squalor.
Staying forever young and forever sixteen is bullshit. Everybody knows it. Unless you want to die, cased in your tomb like a precious thing inside a cabinet, at the ripe old age of a nearly wasted adulthood. At least the coffin does not show glass, so admirers can press their fingertips up against the glass. Their oily noses. Their eyes that are pearls.
Disrespectful.
What love was theirs was untouchable, almost a secret. But jealousy thrashed it, caged it so it remains weak but does not die. It can’t escape from the confines of her heart. A winter passing can last forever inside a broken heart; it begins to get cold, icy winds pick up speed and all parts of the body are left freezing. Dying. But strong enough to keep going indefinitely, for however long until the love gets fixed.
The Best Day is a fictional plaything, constructed inside the mind to make you feel better. So what you thought was the best day that time will never be and you will never get it back. It’ll stay locked inside you forever. A favourite song is no longer important, as it pulls the dregs of those memories up to the surface.
And, oh, it’s far too much to bear.

Baking, Hobbies

CAKE!

I know I may be a whole four days late, but I wanted to share the cake I made for my love interest at Valentine’s. Buying and putting the whole ingredients together, I thought it would be a complete nightmare. I had never made or even attempted a cake on so big a scale as this. Usually my range of baking consists of getting a mix and going from there. So I was super, duper, wheely squeezy proud when the cake came out looking relatively fine and hadn’t flopped!

I proceeded with the icing – which at first went badly – then after I’d got it melted and all syrup-y it went perfectly, like a dream. (Like a dream cake?) With all the Haribo love hearts on it, I can happily confirm that perhaps it really is a dream cake. At least, for children I guess you could say.

Nevertheless, my boyfriend loved it! At least he told me he did.   He’s eating a piece right now, in between chewing his headphones and typing madly away at his keyboard, probably in the mad process of hammering out another screenplay.
My Valentine’s present from him was a handmade, beautifully written comic. He likes comics and is a big nerd for them. Because he got no monies, he made me that over the course of two weeks without me knowing. A few people read it before me, and apparently they cried.
Yes, I cried too!

I think our gifts to each other really did say how much we love each other this Valentine’s. Although my present didn’t seem to shine as bright as his, despite all the shimmer spray I put on it to make it all silver shiny!

P.S
Apologies if this post made you feel slightly queasy with all the ‘love’ references. Just when you thought Valentine’s Day was over for another year!

Hobbies, Music

Oh, Sweet Musical Buds

I’m so excited about the fact that I’ve been reunited with my musical earbuds! FYI, that loosely translates to headphones.

I have been without music for on average roughly three months – almost four. Upon getting my kitten, Mal, when she was a teeny tot she just loved chewing on anything she could get her tiny padded paws on. And a long line of fiddly headphones with delicious tangly wires seemed to be her favourite thing to demolish.
I cannot count how many she has gone through – and not only just mine. She has chewed through my boyfriend’s earphones approximately three? times (I think) and at least one decrepit, old pair of my roommate’s who lives upstairs. What did I tell you? She loves them.

So, on a fairly indulgent trip to ASDA store this morning before my university essay submission (I even treated myself to a £2.50 mop and bucket) I grabbed a pair of headphones. They are blue, and pummeling country music through my ears as of right now, and I love them. Even better, I looked at them properly when I got home this evening and the description isn’t just blue – it’s none other than peppermint blue.

If you’ve read my other blogposts, you’ll know that I adore peppermint tea. There is just simply no other better tea leaf better on this single standing earth. I think these headphones and I are made for each other; our love is of quality. It makes me love my iTunes after being bored of listening to it aloud through my stale laptop speakers so, so much.

Here’s to appreciating music, whatever the genre. As long as you have shiny new peppermint blue headphones, who cares if it’s god awful ugly music? At least the quality’s good, right?

Book Reviews, Hobbies

When God Was A Rabbit (is bliss)

It’s always the books people lend me that are the books I fall in love with the most.

This book is one of those books that, out of all, I love the most.

It has patiently sat on my shelf for a good few weeks (dare I say months?) and – finally – after getting through my first term of university, I have managed to read for fun – and this book was it! It helped me love reading even more, and get back to it. It was a swift and fast paced read; everything was just so magical but in the sense that it was still so relateable to the real and portrayed real life events throughout the narrative, but hints of fantasy were inherent throughout but only in the most subtlest of ways. Do not let this put you off.

I really enjoyed reading about the main protagonist’s, Elly’s, narrative most when she was reflecting on her childhood which takes up the first half of the book. It has that To Kill A Mockingbird feel to it as she writes and relates back to her past. When she grows up I found it difficult to disengage with her childhood voice and kept having to remind myself that now Elly was an adult – but for a child to have that strong a narrative voice that’s surely promising something good, isn’t it?

I really loved this book, I loved it so much I allowed the pages to get worn and the spine to gently break; it deserves to look loved because, although the copy I read wasn’t officially mine, I loved it indefinitely, and I think I will for a long time.

A very long time.

Hobbies, justsayinghello

Hobbying Around

Hello! Excuse the awful, awful pun I named as a title, but I couldn’t resist.

I’ve compiled a list of hobbies I enjoy doing. Some may not be qualified as hobbies – my boyfriend is adamant that one particular thing on my list is not a hobby. I’ll just go ahead and let you guess which one that’s going to be.

1. Reading & Books:

It really muddles my mind when friends of mine claim they have “no books to their name”. How can you not have at least one book on your shelf, or in your wardrobe tucked away, under your bed, at least? Come on, at least get a dictionary. It doesn’t have to be a big one, just a little one you may have received as a going away present from school. (Nobody else’s school did that? No?)
I seriously love my books. I love them so much that I keep them in a glass cabinet so they can remain untouched by sticky mayonnaise fingers and unrelenting dust that spirals downwards to fall onto my pretty pages; they remain locked under my guard. Straight up, I full on panic if my books start to discolour and go brown.
I may be a little control-freak over them, but I don’t care. I cry if the pages get ripped.

Once, one fine lady Jeanette Winterson recited:

“Book collecting is an obsession, an occupation, a disease, an addiction, a fascination, an absurdity, a fate. It is not a hobby. Those who do it must do it. Those who do not do it, think of it as a cousin of stamp collecting, a sister of the trophy cabinet, bastard of a sound bank account and a weak mind.”

This is ultimately how I feel.

2. Tea drinking:

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Drinking tea is a passionate hobby of mine. It’s so perfect – because you can do it alongside other hobbies! Like reading! (Nudge, wink, cheeky face ;D ) I drink any tea that is on offer. When I’m at home, I drink largely peppermint tea because it tastes so good, especially out of a Spongebob Squarepants thermos flask. When I go home from university, I drink either classic caffeinated breakfast tea or herbal infusions berry tea because I always forget to bring my peppermint teabags with me.
When I go to my boyfriend’s house, I drink any tea his mother has in the cupboards, which can range from peppermint and liquorice, and lemongrass tea to deep jasmine tea. My tea hobbying has become so bad that I’ve taken to going to Tea Festivals where I can make my own teabags, and I also stash whatever teabags I can into my bag before leaving a home that isn’t my own.
Apparently, things can only get worse.

3. My Cat:

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Her name is Mal and due to date she is now four iddybiddy months old and getting cheekier everyday! She is my little life companion, and I will admit that I go around the house calling her baby and giving her pretty much everything on my plate at dinner times. This photo of her was taken a couple weeks after I got her.
She is named after Malcolm Reynolds from the American sci-fi TV show Firefly. This way, she can say her name wherever she goes. If she scratches at the door, we will say, “Who is it?” and she will answer her name: “Mal!” If she’s naughty, which she so often is (came home yesterday to find the Christmas tree was on the floor, with the decorations ALSO all over the floor) we’ve taken to swearing at her like the characters from Firefly , “Gorram it, Mal!” I am sorry to those of you who aren’t Firefly fans; this may well mean complete nonsense to you!
She keeps me company throughout the days when I am off work, and cuddles me next to my head when I sleep, pillow to pillow.

5. Knitting:

It’s something I’ve always wanted to do, but I’ve not yet really mastered its complexities. And I know anybody who knits will probably just laugh at that sentence because knitting is hardly so complicated. But, for me, it is 😦 I so want to knit a really cool hat or little booties for my cat. I can get so far a straight line stitch, but I’m afraid that is it. I don’t want to have to wait until I’m an old lady to begin knitting. I want to do it now! I have the wool, and I have the knitting needles. I have some really nice gold ones I picked up from a charity shop which are LUSH. But ever since my sister’s chihuahua decided to take a cheeky whizz on my lovely, baby pink ball of yarn, I have been on standby with my knitting efforts.

6. Writing:

I am a writer. I have always loved writing, and ever since I was 12 I always knew that I wanted to be an author. And I will be an author, one day, even if that only means writing a book and failing to ever get it published. I am still an author, because I have written a book. With my name creeping into more published works, my future is looking shiny. That at least, I hope. I sincerely hope. My secret worlds inside me are sometimes dull, sometimes bleak but for the best of times they are always looking bright.